Get Consent Before Giving Suggestions

A coaching conversation is about drawing out the solutions from the coachee. This is why many coaches refrain from giving their suggestions, even though, the temptation to insert their solutions into the exchange is great. Suggestions are only given when consent is given, and only when necessary.

For example, the coach can move the conversation by asking the coachee to give names to problematic patterns and the desired patterns of behavior. This naming technique will help the coachee to distinguished what is undesirable, and what is desired. See how Gerrard coached Gerald on transforming behaviors using this technique.

Believe that better answers are going to come from the people you coach so give suggestions only when it is absolutely necessary and after getting their consent.

– Jack Canfield and Peter Chee

A boss might give instructions and bark orders, a consultant would analyze data and give advice, but a coach would use curiosity to ask, listen and draw out the best from people.

– Jack Canfield and Peter Chee

From the conversation, you can see how Gerrard does his best not to advice, and uses suggestions and questions to unleash the solutions instead. Advice may make the coachee feel obliged to follow what you say. This does not lead to them feeling empowered. Let the coachee consider the approach to take. Obtaining consent shows respect and a belief in the capability of others. Keep suggestion giving to the minimum and let people come up with their own more empowering and motivating solutions.


Watch #1 Strategic Innovation Coach and ITD World CEO Dr Peter Chee shares how coaches can raise awareness and acceptance using the Pain Acceleration and Pleasure Maximization Technique during a coaching conversation with Henry, a senior leader. You can watch the entire coaching journey when you enroll in the CCMP program today.


  1. WHAT makes giving suggestions without consent problematic in a coaching session?
  2. HOW can coaches remain aware of the need to get consent before giving suggestions?
  3. HOW can coaches ensure the coaching conversation focuses on drawing out solutions?
  4. WHAT behaviours and actions do coaches need to draw out the solutions from others?
  5. WHAT can you to cultivate those behaviours and actions?


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